Next time you need a place to go when you’re high AF, choose Costco. First of all, what’s not to love about Costco when you’re sober? Not only are there endless food samples, which are free, mind you, but they also have ginormous teddy bears waiting to snuggle. And when you’re feeling lazy, chances are you’ll find a comfy lounge chair somewhere in that place. But when you go to Costco high as pie, now that’s an experience you’ll never forget. If you’re one of many pot smokers that have been to Costco while stoned, then here are 10 thoughts you probably had at the time.
1. “Free food? Don’t mind if I do”
Of course, the best part about Costco is the free food samples, especially when you have the munchies. In fact, there are so many of them that you might as well eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner while you’re there.
2. “I wonder if the employees know I’ve already had every single sample twice”
Seriously, though. Can you get in trouble for having too many samples at Costco? If so, do tell.
3. “I need a lounge chair STAT”
After eating all that food, you are bound to feel full AF. In that case, it’s best to take a load off in one of Costco’s comfy lounge chairs. You know, just for a few minutes.
4. “How on earth could my total come out to 200 bucks?!”
You came for one thing, but you left with a million other things. Between the ridiculously large beach towel and the two-gallon jug of massage oil, you couldn’t pick just one item if you tried.
5. “Teddy sooooooo soft”
If you haven’t cuddled with a 93″ teddy bear while high, then you’re missing out.
6. “I’m not so fond of this giant bear anymore”
So, you decided you want that damn bear after all. But boy does the regret start setting in when the employees break out the forklift to move it, and you’re just standing there all stoned and embarrassed.
7. “Oh, hello food court”
Not only does Costco have free samples, but they also have a fricking food court. There’s pizza, hot dogs, salads, and so much more. All in all, Costco is the place to be when you have the munchies.
8. “Time for a game of hide ‘n seek”
Costco is humungous, so you know what that means? There’s plenty of room for hide ‘n seek, that’s what. Or, perhaps even a game of good ol’ Marco Polo. Just a little FYI, their tents make for the best hiding spot.
9. “Can I just live here?”
There’s so much fun to be had at Costco, especially when you’re baked as a cake. From their neverending selection of TVs to their bulk-size snacks, among other things, you could stay there all day. Or, at least until they kick you out, anyway.
10. “Before I leave, just one more sample”
For the road, of course.