12 weed strains named after presidents

Honor our country’s great statesmen the proper way.

Feb 27, 2018
Weed strains named after presidents

Photo courtesy of Chris Rice via Youtube

Oh, America. A place just full of contradictions. Weed is now legal in more than half of states and yet it’s still considered federally illegal. A president has yet to sign onto a bill that would allow Americans to spark a J, although we know some of ’em have done it. In fact, some of the founding fathers allegedly even grew the stuff, even though, admittedly it wasn’t for smoking. It’s a joke. And that’s why, it makes complete sense that there’d be strain names created in honor of our great statesmen. The joke is now official. Here are the top 12 strains named after presidents.

1. Trump OG

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Photo (R) by Gage Skidmore via WikiCommons

This strain from Mission Viejo, California is 70% Indica and 30% Sativa, with approximately 20% THC.  It is a cross between OG Kush and Presidential OG. Even if you dislike the 45th President, you will like his strain. Like its namesake, it sneaks up on you and grabs you by the pussy. (Sorry, not sorry.) Also, like its namesake, it has thin, orange hairs that are long enough for a comb-over. The high causes verboseness, with an inability to focus, just like our current commander-in-chief. Eventually, it will cause you to develop fits of uncontrollable giggles and start mocking everyone around you.

2. Obama Kush

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Photo (R) by Pete Souza via WikiCommons

Our previous president was so damn popular, he has not one, but three, individual strains named after him. While we have to forgive him for not being able to approve cannabis on a federal level, his administration did provide us with the Cole Memo, which protected state-legal cannabusinesses until it was rescinded by Attorney General Jeff Sessions earlier this year. 

Obama Kush, from San Bernardino, California, is an Indica-dominant hybrid that is 65% Indica and 35% Sativa, with approximately 14 to 21% THC. This fluffy orange-haired, pungent strain has a light and non-paranoid effect, perfect for a long day of intense meetings that necessitate serious decision-making.

3. Obama OG

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In Obama’s book, The Audacity of Dope, errr… sorry, Hope, our former president freely admits he smoked weed. His Hawaiian, high school crew was known collectively as the “Choom Gang.” (“Choom” is the Hawaiian colloquial term for getting stoned.) Maui Wowie indeed.

This Indica-dominant hybrid is 70% Indica and 30% Sativa. It is a mix of OG Kush, Afghani, Skunk and who-knows-what. Its THC levels can surpass 22%, with less than 1% CBD.  It provides a powerful body high and a mentally calming effect, which makes it a proper choice to treat symptoms of mood and personality disorders as well as PMS. Be careful though, paranoia is also a possibility.  

4. Obama OG Kush

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Obama OG Kush from Barcelona, Catalonia, is an equally-halved hybrid, with 50% Sativa, 50% Indica and 23% THC. Easily recognizable by its strong scent of pine, it provides more of a body high and shouldn’t make you sleepy. It is recommended for treating chronic pain and fueling mental stimulation. JFK should have used it, instead of being injected with methamphetamines.

5. George Bush

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Photo (R) via WikiCommons

The 41st President, George Herbert Walker Bush, and his son, the 43rd POTUS George W. Bush, are no strangers to drugs. The former presided over the MK ULTRA LSD experiments while head of the CIA and the latter was a coke-head in college.

The George Bush strain has an 80/20 Indica to Sativa ratio, with a THC content of 20%. Bush buds are known for their dry flakiness. You will feel as incompetent and incoherent as Dubya after your first hit. 

6. Monica Lewinsky

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Photo (R) of Monica Lewinsky via Facebook

Ok, while technically, this isn’t one of the strains named after presidents, Lewinsky almost brought the 42nd one down. We highly doubt that a man who famously claimed he “smoked but didn’t inhale” deserves a strain named after him. Monica Lewinsky’s strain, on the other hand, deserves an honorable mention, since she is intimately familiar with cigars. On that note, why not roll some Monica Lewinsky in a blunt?

7. JFK Kush

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Photo (R) of JFK via WikiCommons

The 35th President John Fitzgerald “Jack” Kennedy’s Master Kush is an 80% Indica to 20% Sativa strain, with an average THC level of 21%. This celebrated strain was created specifically as a phenotype to honor the former president. His bud is as classic and timeless as the man himself, with top notes of caramel and lemongrass. His titular bud will evoke Jack’s personality traits, such as his alleged insatiable need for sex.

8. Jackie O

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 Photo (R) of Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis via WikiCommons

JFK once quipped on an official state visit to France that he was “the man who accompanied Jacqueline Kennedy to Paris.” A first lady, famous in her own right, deserves a strain named after her. After her unpopular second marriage to Aristotle Onassis, the world-famous former widow and style icon would become known the world over as Jackie O.

Jackie O is an unlikely strain that is 30% Indica and 70% Sativa, with a 15-20% THC content. As elusive as the real woman, Jackie-O is hard to find. If you are lucky enough to track her down, she will leave you feeling as motivated as an inquiring camera girl, focused enough to renovate your home, and sociable enough to host a high tea. Jackie O is tangy and sweet.

9. Ben Franklin OG

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Photo (R) of Benjamin Franklin via WikiCommons

There are unconfirmed reports that one of America’s founding fathers, Ben Franklin, used hemp at his paper mills. He wasn’t technically a president, however, “Franklin OG,” or “The Franklin,” can also refer to the 14th democratic president, Franklin Pierce, or the 32nd POTUS, Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

Seventy percent Indica and 30 percent Sativa, Ben Franklin OG’s specific genes are a mystery, due to its breeder keeping its recipe proprietary. This strain is slightly arousing and therefore is a salacious strain to have sex on. It provides a languid but lucid high. Its fruity, berry flavor adds to its scrumptiousness.

10. Presidential OG (AKA President OG)

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This strain from Cadillac, Michigan has over 20% THC and less than .05% CBD. It is an offshoot of the OG Kush and Bubble Gum strains. This strain has been known to cause a major case of the munchies so it’s perfect for treating anorexic patients, or severe loss of appetite, due to chemo, for example. It is also known to help with migraines and insomnia.

Pres OG has larger, forest green buds, and is covered by dark orange to amber hairs, and trichome crystals so try not to touch the buds with your bare hands. Use tweezers to pack it into your pot-smoking paraphernalia. It smells like a cross between Skunk, citrus, Pine-Sol cleanser and dirt. It is 90% Indica and 10% Sativa.

11. Presidential Kush

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This strain from Colville, Washington—also known as Presidential OG— is 50% Indica and 50% Sativa. Its buds have a purplish undertone and a thick veneer of lavender-colored trichome crystals. It gives you that overall, blissful feeling like when Obama was still in the White House.

12. OG Presidential Kush

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Confused yet? There are a few OG Presidential strains out there. They all share OG and probably Kush genes, and they all have a minuscule amount of CBD. This strain has 19% THC and is a 50/50 hybrid as well.

There you have it, citizens of the United States. It is now high time you celebrated our presidents in earnest.

Feb 27, 2018